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Prompt:

After a long day at work or school, what are your favorite ways to wind down and decompress?

Post:

Ha!  Hahahahahha!

I love that whoever wrote this prompt assumes that I do actually get to wind down or decompress after a long day at work.  Once again, in my life BC (before children), I’d probably be able to write a post about getting home from work, walking the dogs, sitting and reading for awhile and relaxing with a sophisticated glass of red wine before going out to some lovely grown-up restaurant for supper.

Not anymore.

Now any kind of decompression happens after 8 p.m. – that glorious hour of the night when the toddler goes to bed.

Here’s what usually works, in descending order (if the first one doesn’t have the desired effect, move on to the next):

1) Scotch

2) Another Scotch

3) Whiskey (Stop drinking the good Scotch at this point; tastebuds have already checked out)

4) Hot bath

5) Netflix (preferably a Home Improvement show; if it’s been a really rough day, only This Old House will do – everything in their world can be fixed if you follow the rules and trust your common sense.  It’s so reassuring!)

6) A good book (something halfway between Serious Literature and ChickLit.  Not so smart that it hurts my brain, but no so stupid that I want to throttle the main character *cough* Shopaholic *cough*)

7) Dogs (only if they’re in a good mood and WANT to be smothered by my cuddles; otherwise, leave dogs alone)

And if all those fail . . .

8) Chocolate (Okay, sometimes, I actually start with chocolate.  I consider it to be a divine substance, like ambrosia or coffee; a gift from the gods)

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